I’m writing this as the sun filters through the window, and it feels like the perfect moment to share something close to my heart. As entrepreneurs, we often face a hidden challenge that no one else sees—the internal voice that constantly questions whether we’re doing enough or being enough. I call it the Saboteur.
This Saboteur shows up, uninvited, at the most inconvenient times. It doesn’t matter how much experience we’ve gathered or how successful we’ve been. That voice sneaks in, whispering doubts, telling us that we’re falling short, that we’re not capable of reaching the next level.
Recently, a member of this community reached out, sharing her struggles with slow sales and the pressure to keep pushing. I get it. I’ve been there, working harder and harder, sacrificing personal time, believing that if I just do more, the results will follow. But what I’ve come to learn is that it’s not always about doing more. Sometimes, it’s about how we speak to ourselves and how much power we give to the Saboteur.
But the truth is, that may be only part of the problem. So often I see small business owners on the hamster wheel—staying busy, trying one strategy after another, but not really gaining traction. They stay up late, work longer hours, and sacrifice personal time in the name of creating revenue. I know—because I’ve done this!
I’ve been there countless times over my 37 years of building businesses. But through these experiences—and countless encounters with my inner Saboteur— I’ve learned how to turn down the volume on that voice of self-doubt and keep it from running the show.
For me, it starts with noticing when that voice creeps in. It might begin as a subtle whisper, telling me I’m not enough. But as soon as I recognize it, I pause. Then, I write it down. This simple act helps me create distance, allowing me to see the thought for what it is—just a thought, not the truth.
From there, I ask myself if it’s really true. Most of the time, it isn’t. The Saboteur thrives on assumptions and fears, not facts. By challenging it, I start to weaken its grip.
With the truth revealed, I then reframed the story. Instead of telling myself, "I’m not doing enough," I remind myself of the ways I am showing up. I embrace the truth that I’m exactly where I need to be, making choices aligned with my values.
Lastly, I practice self-compassion. The journey of building and growing a business isn’t easy, and we all have moments of doubt. The key is to treat ourselves with kindness, knowing that we’re doing the best we can.
Here are a few ways I keep my inner critic at bay:
- I avoid social media comparisons, as they often fuel the Saboteur.
- I remind myself that I’ve grown, even if I’m playing out old stories in my head.
- I stop labeling situations as “good” or “bad” and simply accept them as they are.
- I avoid “shoulding” on myself.
- I practice daily gratitude, focusing on what is going well.
- And finally, I ask for support and take action.
As my friend John Dulworth often says,“You can’t wring your hands and roll up your sleeves at the same time.”
Journal Prompts for Reflection:
- Choose a message your Saboteur often whispers to you.
- Pause, sit with it, and question its validity by asking, Is this true?
- Decide what self-compassion practice you will take the next time the Saboteur shows up?
Much love,
Jane